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“As I travel throughout Canada and the world, I become increasingly aware that boys are falling behind girls in academic achievement.  I commend Barry MacDonald for stimulating focused inquiry and dialogue about the varied learning needs of boys who struggle at school.  This gender gap requires the urgent attention of school leaders.”

- Dr. Avis Glaze
Ontario’s Education Commissioner and Senior Advisor to the Minister
of Education
Secretariat for Literacy and Numeracy and recipient of The Order of Ontario



Barry MacDonald adds an important perspective on the issue of boys and video gaming. Let’s look for positives with emerging technologies and not overreact to potential harms. Like drug or alcohol addictions, it is the minority of gamers that get into trouble; and as always, parents play an important role.

Kevin Latourneau Program Manager, Peace Arch Community Services
Producer of Drug Prevention Videos - Cold as Ice, Death By Jib, and High School Confidential



“MacDonald’s powerful and impressive keynote address set a wonderful tone for our annual child care conference.  His ability to reach our delegates through humour and storytelling is commendable.  People wanted more of Barry.  We can’t wait to have him back.”                            
- Karen Norman, Deputy Director, OPTIONS: Services to Communities Society, Surrey





Freeing Boys From Anxiety

Why do some boys in high school become moody, irritable, and prone to angry outbursts? How can parents tell if their poor behaviour often saved for parents at home is just a passing hormonal phase or a sign of something more? This article looks at the hostility in hallways that some boys can bring home, especially boys who are sensitive and prone to anxiety. Practical suggestions are provided to help boys learn that emotional courage is the source of real strength in life.

Click here to read more





Questioning Zero Tolerance

As parents and educators, we naturally want to know that schools are safe, secure places where our children can thrive. When we hear about lock-downs, school shootings, bullying, or other credible threats to our students’ safety, we may long for swift, certain and decisive responses that will guarantee our children’s well-being.

Students, parents and staff need to trust that endangerment of those in our care will not be permitted at school.

However, many thoughtful educators question the effectiveness of a heavy-handed application of a Zero Tolerance policy, where the law is used as a weapon of control for common misbehaviours.

What are the logical consequences of using suspension and expulsion every time the school's conduct code is violated?

Who is learning what when suspension is the knee-jerk disciplinary response to a range of typical adolescent misbehaviours such as swearing, defiance, fighting, smoking and even truancy?

To read click here



Getting beyond a “boys will be boys” mentality...

As a parent of an only son who struggled through high school, and as a post-secondary educator for many years, I have had the great pleasure of working with Barry MacDonald in personal and professional contexts. Like so many others whose lives Barry has touched, I have been deeply impressed by his practical wisdom about human psychology, and the learning needs of boys in particular. His book Boy Smarts ­ Mentoring Boys for Success at School has encouraged a wide variety of parents, teachers, administrators, and other cultural leaders to think critically and imaginatively about ways to help struggling students, especially boys, thrive in the twenty-first century. This action study guide takes his ideas one step further, and provides a structure for educational leaders and parents to field-test his ideas through discussion, questioning, brainstorming and action. Working with this guide will help you build and re-vitalize your community through collaboration and a shared commitment to the generation after us.  


Dr. Sue Ann Cairns
Kwantlen Polytechnic University
Co-author ­ Strategies for Successful Writing

Responding to Masked Anxiety...

It’s common for boys to try to draw adults into an argument to scuttle a discipline discussion ­ especially when they are troubled or anxious. Teachers and parents may become triggered and find themselves reacting instead of responding. Sometimes we can think that boys learn more from a stronger consequence such as being publicly shamed, sent to the office, or suspended, but the results of these tactics usually include alienation and resentment...

To read more click here

Parenting Workshop - 4hrs

Boy Smarts Action Talk:
How to Talk so Boys Will Listen and Listen so Boys Will Talk
(Grades 1 – 12)

Afternoon Workshop, 1:30 - 5:30

For agenda & registration details
Click Here

OVER the past decade an alarming numbers of schools have been cutting back on recess playtime or eliminating it altogether. At the same time, school suspensions, behaviour problems in school, and childhood obesity are on the rise.

Many parents wonder why children who struggle with attention or misbehaviour at school are punished by having to miss recess.

What’s going on here?

To read more click here...

Mentoring Boys on CTV

Click here to watch Mentoring Boys and Barry Macdonald on CTV.

Boy, oh boy!

Read Glenn Mitchell’s, the managing editor of the Vernon Morning Star, comments after attending the recent Vernon Boy Smarts event:

“Through the use of humour and studies and anecdotal common sense, not to mention a powerful point presentation that packed punch, we all learned a few things about how to re-connect with our kids in an already hyper-interconnected world.”

Complete article posted on bottom right column of this page.

In recent months parents have emailed me conveying their anxiety over the impulsivity and aggression they have seen in their boys—and especially in sibling conflicts that just keep escalating rather than quietly going away.

Just as children are not born with good character, they also do not know intuitively how to resolve conflict. Parents know that siblings learn as much from each other as they do from their elders, but boys need our guidance to learn the art of making peace with their siblings.

This third and final article on sibling rivalry recommends ways that you can support positive relationships between siblings from the very beginning, and suggests peacemaking skills you can teach that will serve boys throughout their lives.

To read more click here...





Sibling conflict is not always what it appears to be. One child may goad the other with subtle, almost invisible teasing; another may use more overt aggression. It can be hard, even for parents with front row seats, to tell who started what.

There are no ready-made formulae to deal with your children’s fights. Each family is different.

Still, by following the guidelines in this month’s newsletter, you can avoid some common parental pitfalls, and increase the chances that kids will benefit from the conflicts in the family crucible.

Click here to read more



SIBLING RIVALRY BEYOND CAIN & ABEL


Most parents who have two or more children have become attuned to that moment when, from the other room, playful or excited laughter turns into whining, or angry shouts, or screams or crashes.

Nobody can push emotional buttons like a sibling.

Could it be that sibling conflict is more complex than we thought?

New research shines a light on sibling conflict and offers fresh perspectives to help you make sense of “Leave MY STUFF alone!”

Click here to read more



Reframing Attitudes Toward Active Learners



While it's natural for teachers to want students to be focused and attentive at all times, a student who is fidgeting, twisting a tiny rubber elastic figure in his hands, shuffling books noisily, or even gazing absently out the window, has much to teach. Such students are giving cues that something else is needed.

How can we move from judgment and irritation to a more compassionate and helpful way of viewing these students?

December’s newsletter offers 20 reframing transformations of thought to help you maintain a focus on strengths and foster positive responses to the everyday challenges of parenting and teaching kids.

Click here to read more

At one time in traditional schools, teachers were rewarded for classrooms filled with the sounds of silence and stillness. Now we know that learning involves the body as well as the mind, and that kinesthetic learners in particular learn best when they can use movement.

Creative teachers can capitalize on some students' high energy levels by seeing energy as a resource, and helping to channel it in appropriate, and sometimes helpful ways.

Click here to read more




How do successful teachers engage boys who have gotten off track and are on a collision course with failure?

Read about how a school staff initiated a turnaround experience for a boy who had been derailed in his schooling and isolating himself from the support he so urgently needed.

Click here to read more.

Cultivating Resiliency
in Boys at School



Some boys who drag their feet into the classroom, or skip out to the halls at the first opportunity, often become labeled as unteachable.

How can we respond to the varied needs of boys who are striking out and spiraling downward into despair?

How do transformative teachers seek to reframe a student¹s struggle from being at-risk to being at-promise?






The MacDonald’s tackle WildPlay’s
Monkido Tree Obstacle Course. Click the image to watch.

Are Boys Spending Enough Time Outdoors?



Childhood play in nature reduces stress, encourages creative social play, reduces symptoms of attention deficit disorder, and provides a foundation for environmental awareness and responsibility that carries over into adult life.

While we need to balance risk and safety considerations along with the integration of electronic media into a boy¹s world, we also need to find ways to get our kids outside more where they can experience the wonders of our natural world beyond a screen, especially in the summer.

Click here to read more



   

Your Hooked on Video Games article stimulated a stirring family discussion during our recent car trip, especially with our 14 year old gamer son. I am pleased to say that as a result we are closer, better understanding of each other¹s concerns, and are now openly discussing the values portrayed in the games that trouble us. Thanks for providing us with a vehicle to discuss the “elephant in our living room.”

- Lori, mother and teacher in Langley

How does support
differ from enabling?

Click here to read more

To read more click here

Boy, oh Boy!



Glenn Mitchell, managing editor
The Vernon Morning Star
March 28, 2010

I thought it was kind of amusing the response I got from my oldest son when I was taking him home from tennis practice on Thursday and told him that his mom and I were going to a talk that evening on how to raise boys. "Why?” he asked hesitantly. "Do you think you guys screwed up?"

I laughed. Paused for a second. And then I asked him if he thought we had. “Well, I think we're as good as most of the guys out there," he said somewhat self-righteously, defending himself and, touchingly, although maybe not realizing it, yours truly. I assured him I thought he was an even-better-than-average kid in my books and that it's more about just seeing if there is more to learn about this difficult thing called parenthood.

My wife and I weren't alone. There were some 1000 people at the Vernon Recreation Centre Thursday night to hear Barry MacDonald talk about Boy Smarts - Effective Strategies for Parenting Boys.

First of all congratulations to Jeff Jacobi and Pam Hargreaves and all the other volunteers with the District Parent Advisory Council who successfully organized and brought in such a dynamic educator on a topic that obviously struck a chord with so many of us. Well done.

Certainly a significant number of the audience were educators, enough that at times I felt I was at a teachers' convention, and it was good to see them learning even more about the boys we send to them on a daily basis.
But it was even more heartening to see fellow hockey parents and neighbours seeking out strategies on how to ensure our little guys "become caring, courageous and ethical men."

I couldn’t help but think back to when our first son was born, and it's still one of the top two happiest days of my life and the feeling of euphoria has stayed with me all these years later to some degree. But I also distinctly remember thinking that day-"Where's the manual?"- on what to do with this newborn and suddenly realizing what a huge responsibility I had just helped create. However you move on from deliriously happy
but painfully clueless on that wonderful day and you buy the books and ask your parents and consult with friends and you wing it and do OK. However, there's so many ways to go wrong, especially with boys I learned last night.

Boys account for 90 per cent of juvenile alcohol and drug violations, and 80 per cent of school suspensions, and are five times more likely to have ADHD.....heavy sign. But Thursday night was about hope, not despair. About awareness and strategies, not giving in to age-old stereotypes. Through the use of humour and studies and anecdotal common sense, not to mention a powerful point presentation that packed punch, we all learned a few things about how to re-connect with our kids in an already hyper-interconnected world.

The fact that boys talk less than girls, value independence more, and struggle to make sense of a barrage of macho and sexually-explicit images on a daily basis, all the while trying to overcome the Boy Code of what one has to do to become a man, makes our jobs challenging. However, I believe, most of them are doing
surprisingly well and I'm optimistic. And MacDonald gave us plenty of pointers to help the process along.

Generally he told us try not to "yackety-yack” at them too much (preach less), cut them some Slack (give them more freedom) and "tune into their reality by joining in with what they like to do.” MacDonald also said "laughter lubricates learning" and that "you learn more when you're having fun."

So where I got home that night and my son asked how it went, I told him I learned that I should play more video games with my kids. "Cool," he replied. And so it goes.

To print article click here...